Rental !s

Are you worried that your forum posts are not getting the blue- or red-name attention they deserve? Do people seem to be ignoring your blog or the comments you leave on others’ blogs? Here at Kill Ten Rats, we can help. We have an entire line of reliable, high-quality, efficient exclamation points that can add spice and pizazz to your text. They are available in a variety of fonts and provide rent-to-own options. Kill Ten Rats brand exclamation points are only marginally more expensive in the premium “title” edition than the standard “in-line text” edition.

That single exclamation point in the title of the post got you reading this far. Just imagine what you can do with three or five! Did you notice how much more exciting that last sentence was, just with a different punctuation mark? We also provide consulting services to help you identify sentences that can be spruced up with exclamation points or made more efficient by using fewer letters per word. Check out this satisfied customer:

Before: I think the new instance may be bugged. The difficulty of the final boss is much higher than expected, and it does not seem to be possible for most classes to defeat solo. This should not be marked as solo content.

After: Devs! wut is up with that new boss?!?!!! lolbroken!! fix it

Wow. That kind of post really lets them know just who you are and how much thought you put behind your comments. I think we all know what kind of reaction you deserve. Show them what a winner you are, champ!

: Zubon

11 thoughts on “Rental !s”

  1. Are there any microtransaction plans for these? Sell some customizable ones, as well as the 40% more font size for 8 hours too please! See how wimpy my present exclaimation point is. :(

  2. When are we going to start getting in game spam selling exclamation marks? Another potential business, selling posts on the official forums to push a certain fix through:

    Tired of druids thinking they can tank? We’ll take on the identities of 1,000 angry customers demanding druid tank nerfage.

    Why stop there, devs could auction their bug fixes off to the highest bidders. There are all kinds of ways to monetize games these days.

  3. Everyone knows the x-fire ! stats are skewed towards ? users anyway, they are meaningless (unless they support my point, then they are fully Official (capital O means its extra official))

    Any chance we can get a ‘station access’ type of plan, where we can buy not only extra !, but also the higher tier !11! and the epic !11!11!one. Would add a lot of value to the service.

  4. What annoys me is when people use them in work emails. One or two, sure. But you don’t need 5!!!!! And it’s invariably something I need to read as well, so I can’t just auto ignore them like I do on forums. I wish I could charge for excessive ! use too :(

  5. @Katherine:

    Oh, don’t get me started on multiple punctuation. I hate it when colleagues use the ellipsis. I hate it with a passion.

    Even my manager uses the ellipsis on EVERY email and IM she sends me.

    hey…
    we need something written for blah blah…

    FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!1111

  6. Warrrrgarble!!!!11111!!

    Heh, yeah I love the extra !!!s.. they are even more tasty when they slap down on the caps lock key half-way through…

    J00 neeDS MOAR EXCLI…SXCLA…EXCLE…MOAR OF THESE->!!!!!

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