Obsessed with Poo

What’s in the water down in Irvine? We have ignored the signs for so long. It all began with that (presumably) Dwarf stuck in the outhouse in Searing Gorge. A predicament, but one easily solved by some mass murdering in the area. Proximity to poo: close.

Then Burning Crusade regaled us with the wonderful quest experience of having to dig through twenty bundles of gazelle crap in Nagrand to look for digested cherry seeds. Yum, amirite? Proximity to poo: touch. Unless you RP’d using a stick to sift through the things, which many a roleplayer has done, as I understand it.

Now come Northrend, I’ve taken part in two of these high-class adventuring quests. One in Borean Tundra where you not only have to administer (by way of tossing) a powerful laxative to some wolves so they can evacuate important microfilm fragments, which of course you have to sift through. Proximity to poo: touch. Again. Then in Grizzly Hills not only you eat a bunch of seeds, maliciously tempted by a yellow exclamation sign, but you then have to remove those seeds from the digestion equation by means of yet another laxative. This time one you must prepare and ingest yourself. Then you go to an outhouse, and in between aoe’s of mist and mini-earthquakes (I kid not) you emerge triumphant holding what laid hidden in your detritus: partially digested seed. Proximity to poo: touching. Touching your own poo, man. Far out.

Of course the seeds go back in the bucket for the next trusting soul to pick. It’s the cycle of life. And this is only at level 74 or so. What lies next? Is Kel’Thuzad, well, ‘blocked’? Gotta do something about that too? Do we find out about the Lich King’s irregularity? Is this what the plague was really all about?

One thing’s for sure, Blizzard sure loves shitty quests.

11 thoughts on “Obsessed with Poo”

  1. Oh, and there’s another one I forgot in Howling Fjord, where you have to literally scare the guano out of some bats with fireworks. Then, of course, sift through the droppings.

  2. There is also a quest in Azshara, in the original game but a dozen levels after the outhouse in Searing Gorge, to collect crystalised humanoids, which turn out to be faecal droppings of the elite giants randomly wandering the area.

    Again, you’re touching poo, you just might not realise it.

  3. It’s just the juvenile humor that the industry can’t seem to get out of its repressed teenage male system. It’s stupid, but it could be a lot worse.

    Oh, and there are definitely foul things in Irvine. It’s ground zero for a lot of the housing mess in the economy.

    …maybe all the poo quests are a metaphor for the lives of the devs. Perhaps it’s best not to think too much about that.

  4. Why does poo bother people so much, I mean other than its smell? Scientifically, its just as interesting as dirt and other things that are dead or decaying. Mushrooms anyone?

  5. It doesn’t ‘bother’ me, but I have to wonder why so much poo and never any pee? I mean, if we’re going for the occasional toilet humor bit, go for the gusto and do both.

  6. Don’t forget your first intro to poo: Bat guano from (I think) RFK. And then once out in the Ogre areas near Gadgetzan, you got piles-O-poo on the ground for ‘ambiance’.

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