Author: Zubon

I played Mario Kart Wii today, and I spent more time kvetching about level design than actually playing. I like games that are not afraid to be cute in the North American market, but too many take the “it’s a kids game” excuse to skimp on things like balance or reasonable level design. Many fall prey to two problems at once. First, the learning curve is shallow and short, quite often with great randomness, so there is little difference between being experienced and playing for the first time. Second, the differences that do exist are completely game-breaking, including degenerative strategies, exploits, or tricks trivialize the game. Insert your favorite examples here, say blue shells or raining power-ups and cheap moves in the Smash Brothers series.

You can imagine how I react to level design problems in racing games given my day job. “This cartoon roadway has completely inadequate signage and lining.”

There are additional problems in terms of party games. First, the above, although hopefully the randomness is enough to avoid having new people get stomped by whoever owns the game in question. Second, make sure to bring your save files with the game, because bringing just the game to Bob’s house means nothing is unlocked. I have not seen how portable everything is with the Wiimotes. Third, there is still a learning curve, such as Mario Kart’s maps with falls that can essentially knock you out of the race. You will cycle through courses if you are playing it as a party game, so by the time that you get an idea of the proper path on one map, you are done playing that one, and you are not getting back to it unless you and your friends play at epic length.

Which you might, since you are gamers, but I have accepted that the Wii was not made for us. Obviously that is a great financial decision, because the Wii has been a haberdashery for money hats, but it is disappointing for the core audience left behind. Almost everything utilizing the Wiimote is far more gimmicky than innovative, and it does not seem sensitive enough to do anything really interesting; insert Yahtzee here mocking “wave spasmodically as gameplay.” It is a great system for casual players and for party games, but has it brought us anything much better than the original Wii Sports? It seems like the Gamecube had the best versions of all the Nintendo games.

: Zubon

“You are less punctual than desired!”
“I don’t think your socks match, although it is difficult to tell from here!”
“YOUR MOM has excellent penmanship!”

: Zubon

Anyone have screenshots that measure up to real life? I know we are just primates who react with “ooh, ah” sounds to fire and shiny objects, but damned if the Vikings don’t still have us all beat for awesome. (Carl De Souza with the winning images.)

While some commenters there are down on the second Up Helly Aa picture, as LotRO players know, yes, you drink tea before heading to war. Before a big fight you drink tea, eat an entire rack of lamb (or cram bread), and show off your shiny tokens. Those are the best buffs in the game. Even the ancient Vikings knew that.

: Zubon

Hat tip: Agitator

Today’s Wikipedia article of the day is “Ode on a Grecian Urn,” and Keats is a relevant figure for MMOs. He was a candle that burned brightly and quickly. His odes constituted a new form of poem, although those not immersed in poesy are unlikely to see them as much different from other forms. His works are known more for an effusion of passion and imagery than technical perfection; some say his best works are marred by unbecoming lines, and others debate whether controversial lines “work.”

If you’re not getting the connection, your link on that last one is “bug or feature?” “Ode on a Grecian Urn” is an old favorite that exhibits this well. There are several points when you might pause and ask whether a line really works, either in its content or its form. To my mind, some of them work just because of that — “More happy love! more happy, happy love!” succeeds only to the extent that you accept a narrator effusively overcome by the moment. On content, do we really want to celebrate eternally unfulfilled desire? If Epicurus had a hell, that would be it, but there is a Romantic ideal in teetering on the verge of satisfaction. There many ways to take (or not) the last two lines.

As an MMO player, if you have not read “Ode on a Grecian Urn,” you really ought. Someone pick a tune, and it could be our national anthem. That eternally unfulfilled desire? That’s what you are paying for. Those frozen lovers are your treadmill, always on the verge of ecstacy, never quite reaching it, where joy is found in the endless almost-attaining. The world is static, unchanging, with events clearly happening but never actually resolving. There is an eternal spring, and the silent pipes play on.

: Zubon

For anyone who does not believe in poetry-based “controversy,” (1) this was bleeding-edge stuff in 1819, and (2) like you have never seen a forum explode about whether changing Rogue positional damage by 2% will completely ruin the game.

I’m not sure if a strange inverse-nostalgia lowered my expectations to the point that not being physically poked in the eye was a plus, but the open beta seemed far better.
– Zoso

: Zubon